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Looking for a specific type of humor? Youโve come to the right place! Explore our categorized joke collections below to read the newest, funniest, and most popular jokes on the web. Click any category header to see all jokes in that section.
Do you like whales?
Because we can go hump back at my place.
Because we can go hump back at my place.
Are you a sea lion?
Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight.
Because I can sea you lion in my bed tonight.
Why should you never play poker at the zoo? Too many cheetahs
My friends bet me that I wouldnโt be able to start a conversation with the hottest person in the bar. Wanna buy some drinks with their money?
Is your bday on October 10? Cuz youโre a 10/10 ๐ฏ
Are you a cat? Because you're purrfect.
Is your body a map?
Because I love to travel.
Because I love to travel.
If I said you had a beautiful body,
would you hold it against me?
would you hold it against me?
Iโm no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bedrock.
See you this weekend!
See you this weekend!
You look so familiarโฆdid we have class together? I could've sworn we had chemistry.
Much like Santa, I also have a gift for you in my sleigh.
If you come over, Iโll give it to you.
If you come over, Iโll give it to you.
If a fat man puts you in a bag tonight, donโt worry, I asked for you for Christmas.
Did you hear of the new disease called beautiful, I think you're infected.
You look hotter than my coffee.
Hey!
My name is Microsoft.
Can I crash at your place tonight after our date?
My name is Microsoft.
Can I crash at your place tonight after our date?
Are you a keyboard? Because youโre just my type.
Is your name Waldo? Because someone like you is hard to find.
Are you a keyboard? Because youโre just my type.
Is your face Mcdonalds? Cause im lovin it!
Do you also love winter? Because I'm snow glad I met you.
Somebody needs to call the bomb squad, because you're the bomb!
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
Iโm not a dentist,
but I bet I could give you a filling if you wanted me to.
but I bet I could give you a filling if you wanted me to.
Great dress.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
Tell your chest to stop staring at my eyes when youโre around me.
It always distracts me.
It always distracts me.
Wanna come to the party in my bed tonight?
Are you Mulan?
Because I want you to handle my sword tonight.
Because I want you to handle my sword tonight.
Are you the Little Mermaid? Because I want to be part of your world.
Hereโs $10. Drink until I am really good looking, then come and talk to me.
Do you like fishing?
Because you just caught me.
Because you just caught me.
Just like my favorite breakfast food,
I canโt wait to flip you over.
I canโt wait to flip you over.
Are you a cinnamon roll? Soft, sweet, and warming everyone up.
Are you craving Pizza? Because Iโd love to get a pizz-a you
Just so you know, tonight will be unforgettable.
Dinner first, or can we go straight for dessert tonight?
Stop thinking about me naked!
Sheesh.
Sheesh.
Great dress.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
Great dress.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
I bought some whipped creamโ
Want to be the dessert?
Want to be the dessert?
If you look this good in clothes,
I canโt imagine how good youโll look out of them.
I canโt imagine how good youโll look out of them.
I canโt stop thinking about all the fun things...
I canโt stop thinking about all the fun things we could be doing together.
I canโt stop thinking about all the fun things we could be doing together.
Is your body a map?
Because I love to travel.
Because I love to travel.
Do you want to commit a sin for your next confessional?
Let me know tonight!
Let me know tonight!
I wish I was cos squared and you were sin squared because together we'd be one.
Are you the Little Mermaid? Because I want to be part of your world.
Mario is Italian
Looks like a Mexican
Invented by the Japanese
Lives in America
Jumps like a black guy
Takes coins like a jew
Nimimerkki: SuperFan
Looks like a Mexican
Invented by the Japanese
Lives in America
Jumps like a black guy
Takes coins like a jew
Nimimerkki: SuperFan
Stop thinking about me naked!
Sheesh.
Sheesh.
Come over ASAP.
Tell your chest to stop staring at my eyes when youโre around me.
It always distracts me.
It always distracts me.
Dinner first, or can we go straight for dessert tonight?
Stop thinking about me naked!
Sheesh.
Sheesh.
Great dress.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
Tonight, pretend Iโm a pirate and give me that booty.
See you later!
See you later!
Dinner first, or can we go straight for dessert tonight?
I donโt like sitting here at work when I could...
be at home doing things to you.
be at home doing things to you.
I canโt stop thinking about all the fun things...
I canโt stop thinking about all the fun things we could be doing together.
I canโt stop thinking about all the fun things we could be doing together.
Do you want to commit a sin for your next confessional?
Let me know tonight!
Let me know tonight!
Much like Santa, I also have a gift for you in my sleigh.
If you come over, Iโll give it to you.
If you come over, Iโll give it to you.
If a fat man puts you in a bag tonight, donโt worry, I asked for you for Christmas.
Hereโs $10. Drink until I am really good looking, then come and talk to me.
Dinner first, or can we go straight for dessert tonight?
Great dress.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
Iโm sorry, Iโll have to rip it apart later tonight.
I donโt like sitting here at work when I could...
be at home doing things to you.
be at home doing things to you.
Dinner first, or can we go straight for dessert tonight?
Stop thinking about me naked!
Sheesh.
Sheesh.
Come over ASAP.
Do you like sleeping? [Yeah] Cool, we should do it together sometime!
Why was Mario coughing a lot?
- Something went down the wrong tube.
- Something went down the wrong tube.
Why did the two ghosts attack Mario?
- To give him a boo-boo.
- To give him a boo-boo.
What do you call the mother who gave birth to Super Mario?
- Mario Maker
- Mario Maker
Hey!
My name is Microsoft.
Can I crash at your place tonight after our date?
My name is Microsoft.
Can I crash at your place tonight after our date?
Is your name Google? Youโve got everything Iโm searching for.
Is your name Wi-fi? Because I'm really feeling a connection.
I think I could fall madly into bed with you right now.
Iโm not a dentist,
but I bet I could give you a filling if you wanted me to.
but I bet I could give you a filling if you wanted me to.
Hey!
My name is Microsoft.
Can I crash at your place tonight after our date?
My name is Microsoft.
Can I crash at your place tonight after our date?
I donโt like sitting here at work when I could...
be at home doing things to you.
be at home doing things to you.