Hey, what’s your favorite pickup line? [Then just use it on them.]
Hey, my name is [insert name], but you can call me tomorrow.
If “good looking” was a crime, I’m pretty sure you’d be serving a life sentence.
I’ll show you my tan lines if you’ll show me yours.
Your eyes have no secrets. They have already told me that you’re going home with me tonight.
I told my girlfriend she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.
Without women sex would be a pain in the ass
I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.
I don't trust those trees. They seem kind of shady.
I asked my dog what's two minus two. He said nothing.
A skeleton walks into a bar and says, Hey, bartender. I'll have one beer and a mop.
I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know y.
Dear Math, grow up and solve your own problems.
My wife said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.
I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.